little me, big me

Slightly shifting gears here on the ol' blog. Thought it might be fun to start a little writing project. I recently unearthed my childhood diary. I tore through the pastel-colored pages in one night. And I noticed one thing: I was as clueless about boys then, as I am now. So here's the plan. I share an entry from my kid musings and try to parallel it with current reflections. Fun, right? Maybe. Could be deeply embarrassing. We'll see. Starting with with first mention of being interested in boys.

January 21, 1992

I haven't written for a long time. Here's an update. R is 2 1/2 a getting really big and always getting into trouble. L (13) is always on the phone and going through boy crisis. P (9) has a lot of friends but always seems to get her way. I'm going to Cutten School now and am becoming friends with E, S, C, B, & A. Today I had a regular day in 6th grade. We change classes with the three sixth grade teachers: Ms. B, Mr. N, and my teacher Mr. O. But today I had Gate whitch is a gifted education program. I'm going to Disneyworld and I'm SO x-cited. We (my friends listed above) plus B (who's kinda cute) are doing a Dare skit (a Drug Abuse Program) about what can happen if you take Drugs. I want to tell my dad about my skit but he's on the phone. Full House is going to be on in 45 minutes. I LOVE Full House (ok, like it) (a lot). Tomorrow we're going to get a new boy in my class. Hope he's cute! (keep my fingers crossed.) I'm going to try to right in this every day. I know I've said this a lot but I'm going to try to write a lot more and sorry I haven't written in such a long time.

Recently

The beauty of the mountains
the song of a bird
a strong cup of coffee
the warmth of the sun
the comfort of a lounge chair.
A morning to rise,
and relax,
and smile.
To be grateful
for all life offers.
I hold out my hands,
allow the bounty to fall,
to embrace it.
My choice is happiness.
No one promised perfection,
no one ensured a charmed life.
So I guess I will take
the good with the bad.
I will rejoice and I will cry,
I will laugh and I will mourn.
And most of the time
I will have a partner,
a companion through the
joy and the sadness.
But sometimes, occasionally,
I will face this life
alone.
My smile will go unseen,
my tear will fall with
no one to wipe it away.
So, whether solitary,
or together,
I will accept this.
I will wrap my arms
tightly around this life.

Like a dream

It's an ad for glasses, but really I'm coveting the gorgeous dresses Shirley Manson gets to wear. And I'm pretty sure I want this song to be my own personal soundtrack. Love!

Can someone teach me to do this?

I just adore little videos that make me smile and feel all girly inside. This is one of those.

Frankie & Johnny from Isobel Knowles on Vimeo.

Today

Today I woke up and decided I was going to be productive. By the end of the day, I learned I am not very good at being productive. First, I slept in late. I justified my 11 hour slumber by thinking, "Wow, I must've been really tired. I obviously needed some sleep." Genius. Next, I decided I ought to celebrate Mother's Day (because it has sooo much to do with me) by having breakfast in bed. A breakfast that consisted of a mug of Trader Joes new Joe Joes Ice Cream. Mid-way through "breakfast," I got a text from Jessica asking if I wanted to grab brunch. To avoid confusion, brunch is a term used by my friends and I for a mid-day meal, often consisting of coffee and breakfast items. Sometimes bloody marys or mimosas as well. It is NOT an expensive all-you-can-eat buffet. Of course I agreed, so Jessica and I headed to Heirloom. Luckily, the mother's day crowd had either risen much earlier than us, or were chased away by the clouds. Either way, we breezed in for coffee, a sandwich (as we had missed breakfast by an hour), and conversation. Notice at this point in the day, nothing of any substance had been accomplished. It was 2:00.

After returning home, Jessica asked me to upload some songs onto her ipod, of which I readily agreed. Finally, at this point, I can say I achieved something. And by I, I mean Jessica did my dishes in exchange for an ipod mix. With the dishes sparkling, Jessica left. At this point my dreams of cleaning my entire house seemed impossible. The fact that I am easily distracted does not help my lofty "clean my whole house" goals. So, while my house is not white glove clean, I did make some steps in the right direction: washed and folded laundry (including sheets and towels), made bed, washed couch and chair slip covers, vacuumed living room and hall (including use of attachment for corners and cobwebs), painted toenails (counts right?), conversation with friend regarding baby shower we're planning, put give-away clothes in car, watered plants, tidied living room, made dinner. Oh, and I watched 3 episodes of Project Runway. Really, looking at the list, I did okay. Maybe I didn't purge my apartment of unnecessary items, as was my original goal, but maybe chipping away at things little by little is more my style.

Oh, and yes, I did call my mom and wish her a happy Mother's Day. But that could never be considered a chore. On that note, I did make a rather delicious, easy, inexpensive meal from items in my pantry. Here's the recipe just in case you like things like that.

Lentil Stew with Sausage

1 T Olive oil

2 onions, chopped (about 2 cups)

3 cloves garlic, minced

4 carrots, coarsely chopped or sliced (about 1 1/2 cups)

1 lb Smoked Sausage, sliced

1 lb lentils, rinsed and drained

4 cups chicken or vegetable broth

1 tsp dried sage

1 tsp dried thyme

1/4 tsp ground black pepper

1 tsp salt or to taste

1 lb fresh kale or spinach, stems trimmed, leaves chopped (about 8 cups)

In a 6-8 quart pot or Dutch oven, heat oil over med-high heat. Saute onions, garlic and carrots until soft, about 10 minutes. Add sausage lentils, broth, sage, thyme, pepper and salt. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer, covered, until lentils are barely tender, about 20 minutes. Stir in kale or spinach. Bring to a boil, cover, and simmer for 10 minutes or until lentils are tender. Ladle into soup bowls.

Makes 8 servings

My notes: I halved the recipe. I didn't have carrots or kale/spinach, so I added some frozen peas at the same time as the sausage. I also added extra broth, but I think this might have been necessary because of the peas. I used fresh thyme instead of dry since I had some. The sausage I used was Trader Joes Smoked Andouille Chicken Sausage, which was perfect. It's a thick, chili-like consistency when it's all cooked up. I think it would be yummy with some bacon in it. And celery. I also for a moment thought to Greek-ify it by adding kalamata olives and feta. I'll let you know if I try any of these variations.

Quite possibly my new favorite thing ever

I ran across this on someone else's blog and had to share it on mine. It's like five minutes of pure bliss for me: beautiful clothes, cotton candy indie pop, red lipstick, Frenchy hair, color, Jason Schwartzman and Kirsten Dunst, fun. I'm pretty sure you'll agree.

I am ok

Disappointment stifles all.

I try to push it away,

But all my strength is not enough.

Friends lend a hand,

But it stands firm,

Steadfastly cemented in place,

And the resistance

Seems to make it stronger.

There was so much hope:

Mounds and mounds

Piled high.

I let it cover me

'Til I could see nothing else.

But all has been devoured

By the greedy monster of absence.

How can nothing take so much?

It gets fat off sleep, joy, motivation

And I am left with an emptiness

I want desperately to fill.

Why do I always run with arms

wide open,

When I should tip toe cautiously--

wary of the land mines hidden

below the surface,

Ready to destroy me.

Holiday Gift Guide

A little something I put together for fun. Most are under $30!

The Pencil Factory Newsprint, $10
Promotional newsprint poster zine by the illustrators and designers in The Pencil Factory
http://thepencilfactory.bigcartel.com/product/15-uses-for-newsprint


Bananagrams game, $15.50
Sorta Scrabble crossed with Boggle. Shout out to Jessie Rupert.
http://www.blueribbongeneralstore.net/2008-p-Games.html


Pride and Prejudice with Ruben Toledo, $16
Jane Austen plus couture fashion illustrator equals girly perfection.
http://fredflare.com/customer/product.php?productid=5268&style=N/A


Foodie Fight game, $19.95
All the fun, none of the mess.
http://fredflare.com/customer/product.php?productid=3232&style=N/A


Studded Blackhearts Belt, $14
Add a little edge to an outfit.
http://fredflare.com/customer/product.php?productid=5348&style=MD/LG


Fuji Instax Instant Camera, $130

The Polariod of 2010.
http://www.urbanoutfitters.com:80/urban/catalog/productdetail.jsp?itemdescription=true&itemCount=10&startValue=11&selectedProductColor

=&sortby=&id=17140518&parentid=A_COLL_TOPRATED&sortProperties=

+subCategoryPosition,&navCount=60&navAction=poppushpush&color=&pushId=

A_COLL_TOPRATED&popId=APARTMENT_WHATSNEW&prepushId=


Jamie’s Food Revolution Cookbook, $26.25
I fell in love with this cookbook while in England this summer. Love Jamie for his delicious, simple, straight-forward approach to cooking.
http://www.amazon.com/Jamies-Food-Revolution-Rediscover-Affordable/dp/1401323596/ref=wl_it_dp_o?ie=UTF8&coliid=I21TUHSEU4LTRJ&colid=2AXJR49FOSHS3


The Twilight Saga: New Moon Soundtrack, $9.99
Whether you’re obsessed (Team Edward! Team Jacob!) or just wish it would come to an end already, you will be impressed by this collection of music. Bon Iver, Anya Marina, Death Cab for Cutie. Like a really good mix CD. Every song’s a winner.
http://www.amazon.com/Twilight-Saga-New-Moon-Soundtrack/dp/B0029O08WA/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=music&qid=1259789406&sr=8-1


Personal Pocket Calendar, $25
Staying organized and beautiful.
http://www.jcrew.com/AST/DynamicAsst/GiftGuide2009/forher/25under/PRDOVR~20918/20918.jsp


Crushed Glitter Magic Wallet, $16.50
Because sometimes you need a little glamour in your pocket.
http://www.jcrew.com/AST/DynamicAsst/GiftGuide2009/forher/25under/PRDOVR~20986/20986.jsp


Sprigs Banjees Wrist Wallet, $14.95-$17.95
Solves my “what to do with my keys during my run” problem. Am also considering wearing it as a cuff next time I go out dancing.
http://www.sprigsville.com/banjees/index.html


Bean’s Moonbeam Clock, $39.50
The sound of a buzzing alarm makes me cringe. Being awoken by a light sounds wonderful. And the cute retro design is fantastic as well.
http://www.llbean.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/CategoryDisplay?catalog_id=PN&storeId=1&langId=-1&catalogId=1&categoryId=33149&ddkey=http:LLBSearchDispatch


Mr. Beer Deluxe Edition Home Brew Kit, $29.95
What guy (or girl!) wouldn’t love to a) make his own beer, and b) drink it!
http://www.mrbeer.com/category-exec/category_id/2


Sephora by OPI Nail Colour Gift Set, $18
Tight budget means no extra cash for manicures and pedicures. Not a problem with these three perfect colors in a formula that really stands up.
http://www.sephora.com/browse/product.jhtml?id=P249357&categoryId=C19281


Main Street Market Tote Bag in Cream Stripe, $35
Yes, it’s a man-purse, but why should girls have all the fun?! Plus, if he doesn’t like it, you can steal it. It’s a win-win, really.
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=32886190


Happy shopping!