Sunday, August 18, 2013

little me, big me

Slightly shifting gears here on the ol' blog. Thought it might be fun to start a little writing project. I recently unearthed my childhood diary. I tore through the pastel-colored pages in one night. And I noticed one thing: I was as clueless about boys then, as I am now. So here's the plan. I share an entry from my kid musings and try to parallel it with current reflections. Fun, right? Maybe. Could be deeply embarrassing. We'll see. Starting with with first mention of being interested in boys.

January 21, 1992

I haven't written for a long time. Here's an update. R is 2 1/2 a getting really big and always getting into trouble. L (13) is always on the phone and going through boy crisis. P (9) has a lot of friends but always seems to get her way. I'm going to Cutten School now and am becoming friends with E, S, C, B, & A. Today I had a regular day in 6th grade. We change classes with the three sixth grade teachers: Ms. B, Mr. N, and my teacher Mr. O. But today I had Gate whitch is a gifted education program. I'm going to Disneyworld and I'm SO x-cited. We (my friends listed above) plus B (who's kinda cute) are doing a Dare skit (a Drug Abuse Program) about what can happen if you take Drugs. I want to tell my dad about my skit but he's on the phone. Full House is going to be on in 45 minutes. I LOVE Full House (ok, like it) (a lot). Tomorrow we're going to get a new boy in my class. Hope he's cute! (keep my fingers crossed.) I'm going to try to right in this every day. I know I've said this a lot but I'm going to try to write a lot more and sorry I haven't written in such a long time.

Recently

The beauty of the mountains
the song of a bird
a strong cup of coffee
the warmth of the sun
the comfort of a lounge chair.
A morning to rise,
and relax,
and smile.
To be grateful
for all life offers.
I hold out my hands,
allow the bounty to fall,
to embrace it.
My choice is happiness.
No one promised perfection,
no one ensured a charmed life.
So I guess I will take
the good with the bad.
I will rejoice and I will cry,
I will laugh and I will mourn.
And most of the time
I will have a partner,
a companion through the
joy and the sadness.
But sometimes, occasionally,
I will face this life
alone.
My smile will go unseen,
my tear will fall with
no one to wipe it away.
So, whether solitary,
or together,
I will accept this.
I will wrap my arms
tightly around this life.

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